Wednesday, May 5, 2010

Saying YES to Squelching Humor

Since its inception, I’ve been 100% FOR the proposed new arena in Lincoln. Downtown facilities are either lacking in space or quality. And I’m all for paying in when it means great services, facilities, parks and schools.

But... a new Arena likely means the demise of the Pershing Center.
And... the new Arena would be in a different area of downtown.

The Pershing Center has been around longer than bananas, and it quite outdated, inconvenient and really quite dilapidated. With a ceiling missing some tiles and buckets all over to catch drips, is it really a good idea to have trapeze artists swinging from what remains of it? At the intermission of the Sesame Street Live performance, wouldn't it be nice for the one bathroom near us to have more than 3 stalls when each of us parents is toting a potty-training preschooler?

Getting rid of The Persh (pronounced purzsh) (yes, I’m the only one that says this) means getting rid of my source for humor. If the skaters aren’t across the street from my office, will I be able to mock them mercilessly? Who will yell at me as I cross the street before the crosswalk flashes? What about the circus cows? Who will watch the groupies hovering in their best EMO outfits to try and get a glimpse of their idol?

Another issue? Pershing is home to many annual pancake feeds.
Yeah, I know. A real tragedy indeed.

While I’d like to believe a new arena could bring in some great shows that currently only happen in Omaha, I’m not sure. Whether it’s Omaha or Lincoln, you’re still in Nebraska and let’s face it: people think Nebraska is pretty lame.


Aziz Ansari just canceled on us to host the VMAs.
Dr. House doesn’t even believe Nebraska exists.

But will I still vote for it? YES.
I just might have to find a new job closer to the arena.
Priorities, people. Priorities.

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