Saturday, February 28, 2009

Conversing with a 2 Year Old

A: Elliot. Repeat after me. Mommy
E: Momma
A: I want
E: Ah wann
A: more
E: moh
A: milk
E: milk
A: please
E: peas

A: Okay - say "Mommy, I want more milk please."
E: Yeah!

(F and A laugh.)

Thursday, February 26, 2009

Airport Experience

My flight last night from Chicago to Lincoln was exhausting.

I flash a toothy smile to my seat-mate who greets me with ... nothing. He looked away. As I am lowering myself into the seat - not after I had already sat - he was quickly at work getting that armrest down should my cooties jump the one inch abyss between us.

Armrest secured, he stakes his property by hanging his elbow into my seat space. It wasn't until he nudged my purse with his foot to take up some of my foot space that I was totally annoyed.

Did I mention we haven't even taxied from the gate yet?

I had to push myself into his elbow just to get my seat belt buckled. He didn't budge - just stared out the window. The flight attendant came around to check belts and he decided to be a funny guy and not show her his belt. She asked twice before he finally made a very funny (not at all, actually) joke about her need to open up and trust men.

What? She's doing her job.

I digress. He got out his book and slid his elbow over further. At this point I was cussing that I finished my book on the Cleveland - Chicago leg and had nothing to do but flip through the Sky Mall for the 18th time. All, of course, while leaning to my left to avoid getting jabbed in the ribs the entire time. What was he reading? A book on manhood and how women are nothing but security blankets that get in the man's way of developing.

What'd I do? I leaned. I flew uncomfortably. I got hit in the shoulder and head by the flight attendant's butt. And then again with her drink cart. And, in my head I finished the homework of the girl across the aisle - a simple haiku. (It was either that or breakdown the chemical components of plant decomposition.) Enjoy.

Inferior I
You have inflicted on me
Unrequested grief

Thursday, February 19, 2009

Come One, Come All

The Scavenger Hunt is open through this weekend, at least so get to it!

I only have 7 or 8 responses and I can tell you that not many got all 10 correct.. and I'm considering giving consolation prizes - 1st one, funniest answer, etc. Who knows - it's my game and I can do what I want!

Saturday, February 14, 2009

Post #200 - Ready to Scavenge???

Here we go - blog post #200. I don't have anything new and fancy because, as Fred said to me "you never said what you wanted to do" even though all the ladies out there know that probably isn't true.... Anyway - we may have a new look coming up. At least I hope to.

The Scavenger Hunt starts today. You will find ALL of the answers right here in my blog - you just have to look. When you have all of your answers, shoot me an email (or put it in the comments if you don't care if others see your answers).

Prizes - Everyone with correct answers gets put into a hat (or other bowl-like paper holding object) and I will draw a name. Or names, plural, if I get a good response.

You don't have to know us to play - so join in and invite your friends!

1. If Fred was Dr. Rock, who would he start a practice with?
2. What inspired my first tattoo?
3. What was the Super Secret gift?
4. What TV show do I watch whenever I'm home for a snow day?
5. Who is Crazy Brenda?
6. How did Elliot get his first black eye?
7. What would I like to write a book about?
8. What was Elliot for Halloween 07?
9. How did I embarrass Fred at work without being there?
10. What disease did Elliot get that I thought was only for cows?


Thursday, February 12, 2009

The Cat Lost a Life Tonight

Elliot was hungry so I fixed him the staple meal of microwavable raviolis (sorry, Jen) and threw in some corn for good measure. Warm it up and put it plus a cup of milk right on top of Elmo's head where Elliot insists it belongs.

While Elliot starts eating, I feed my facebook addiction. Then this:

E: Momma, Na. (Na = Sienna)
A: Yeah, did Sienna just come inside?
E: Yeah.

E: Na. Na. NA!
A: (Sucked into facebook)
E: NA! No no Na!
A: (Glances over and see's Sienna sitting next to him.) Elliot, Sienna is fine - she can sit next to you. (Back to fb.)

E: NO NO NO Na! No eet Na!
A: (Turns around) What the F, Sienna????

She was sitting on the table on the other side of his plate licking his food. Drinking his milk. He stared at her in complete disbelief and kept mumbling 'no no no Na.' I scooted her off the table, yelled at her and sent her outside. Elliot sat. Stunned.

I apologized to Elliot. He shoved his plate.
A: Elliot, honey, I am so so sorry! I didn't see her eating your food!
E: Na eet. No no Na.
A: Yes, Sienna is naughty. Do you need new food?
E: Yeah.
A: Sandwich be okay?
E: Yeah.

E: Na go bye-bye?
A: Yeah, honey, she's outside. And with any luck she'll never come back.

Puppies, Puppies Everywhere!

Lately Elliot has really gotten into cukkereen (coloring) whether it be inside with crayons or outside with chalk. This week he was home for 3 days with what was probably the pneumonia virus caught early so we did A LOT of coloring.

What does he draw? Puppies. Lots and lots of puppies.

We have puppies on the driveway. Puppies on the back patio. Puppies all over Elmo's face in his coloring book. I have puppies on the back of random pieces of paper and puppies inside Fred's ESPN Magazine.

Every. Single. Thing. He. Draws. Is. A. Puppy. "Look Momma, Puppy!"

And he beams so proudly - how can you not agree that that teeny tiny scribble of lime green looks just like a puppy?

Saturday, February 7, 2009

For all you Number Lovers

About this time last year, Fred installed a Google Analytics tracker on my blog so I could see how much traffic I get.

I admit, it's kind of surprising. In the last year...

707 individual people (computers) have been on my site.
Those 707 people visited over 8,000 times!
I have been seen in 37 states, 23 countries and read in 7 languages.

Top 5 countries: USA, Canada, Spain, France and Italy
Top 5 states: Nebraska, Ohio, Illinois, Georgia and Kansas

Kind of dorky, I know. I think it's interesting.

Friday, February 6, 2009

Post #196

Hello, Internet! Today marks my 196th post to the Seckmans Say What? blog. It's been a fun (and educational) experience. But I'm not done yet.

Post #200 will be monumental. Huge. Innovative - wait, maybe not innovative and probably not all that huge either. But I'm going to change some things up.

A snippet: I will be conducting the first ever Seckmans Say What blog scavenger hunt. In post #200, you will be given a list of questions that you will need to scavenge through my blog to find the answers to. Anyone and everyone (even if you don't know me) can join in the fun. Why should you? Prizes, my friends, prizes.

But maybe not prizes plural. It just sounded better.

I don't yet know what these prizes are but they are destined to be fabulous. I will put all names of folks with all correct answers into a hat and choose at random the winner(s).

Only 3 more posts until the game begins... start studying!

Tuesday, February 3, 2009

The Future Elliot James

According to the Child Height Predictor, Elliot is going to be all of 5 feet, 5 inches tall at age 18. It'll be interesting to see how accurate this is!

Sunday, February 1, 2009

When I Grow Up...

I think I finally figured out what I want to do when I grow up - be a professional culinary artist specializing in cakes and other sugar delicacies.

Either that or I've been watching too much Food Network.