Friday, October 22, 2010

An Open Letter to The Famous Mouse

Dear Mickey Mouse,

Welcome to Lincoln! I completely forgot you were going to be in town this weekend until my drive into work. I hope you find our cool weather pleasant and take note that we haven't had any snow yet. The Mayor is holding that until after your trip because we know how displaced you're feeling right now.

I assume you use a trucking company and don't just let Goofy or Donald drive so I would like to file a formal request to the trucking company you're using to make sure all of their drivers are properly licensed. I'm just not convinced that he needed to block ALL 4 lanes of traffic and then back in and drive out 6 (yes, I counted) times just to get the truck in the loading area. For a truck driver, I would think that's an essential part of driving a truck.

And six trucks? SIX! Seems someone has a lot of baggage.

Also, the tour buses: I counted 3 buses. THREE. Which, for the relative size of you and your closest friends, isn't that many and I question why you don't have more? Surely Daisy requires her own bus?

While I do appreciate the joy you bring into the lives of children (and suck out of parents for the amount of money they fork out for anything related to you), I am hard-pressed to find the fine elements of Mickey Mouse roadies, blocked traffic lanes and complete lack of parking. On that note - it had BETTER be your roadies creating the thick fog of mary jane smoke and not you or so help me...

Anyway, I better get going. I have to keep pretending like you're not here so that Elliot doesn't demand to visit with you to sing that obnoxious hot dog, hot dog, hot diggity dog song.

Anna Seckman

1 comment:

Tina said...

I don't know... there were a lot of smelly smoke clouds during the performance - Mickey kept blaming Donald...